This Year is Different

Last year was a hard year. The tumultuous divisive political climate created a fog that suffocated the joy of God’s gifts in my life. Throughout the year, I forgot that God has given me joy and peace and that I can choose to partake in those gifts.

But this year, I’m shaking off the fog.

Somehow, I’ve forgotten who I was. I believed that titles others gave me -unworthy, sexual assault victim, crybaby, divisive, complainer, less than, racebaiter – were accurate. Those titles weighed down how I saw myself and stole away joy.

But this year, I’m going to remember who I am. I am beautiful daughter of the King. And just like his first daughter Eve, I was made with purpose.

Eve was made to be Adam’s ezer – the Hebrew word for helper. “Ezer describes aspects of God’s character: he is our strength, our rescuer, our protector, and our help! And ezer was the Holy Spirit’s choice of word to describe the first woman. Eve was someone who would provide valuable and vital strength to Adam.” God made all of his daughters with the same beautiful purpose as Eve.

We are ezer’s to the world. Made in God’s image and made to mirror his strength and his ability to be a force in bring his purposes to the world.

In 2018, I’m going to remember that I’m made in his image. And when the world tries to degrade my understanding of what it means to be a woman, I’m not going to let that affect how I see myself. I’m going to hold my head high and remember that I was made in God’s image "to do the good works, which God prepared in advance" for me to do. I’m going to trust my father when he says he loves me. I’m going to believe him when he says, I can do anything. I’m going to follow him and find joy in walking with him.

When I see the evils of this world, I’m not going to let the pain leave me with a sense of hopelessness. I’m going to remember that Jesus has already won. That “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old older of things has passed away.”

As the world’s injustices become painfully clear, I’m going to remember that Jesus feels that pain. Jesus defeated death and with his blood he “purchased for God persons from every tribe and language and people and nation.” That his kingdom is coming and that in his kingdom there will be no injustice.

I’m choosing to trust God that the story has been written. I can put my trust in the fact that it his new Kingdom is coming and that I don’t have to be in despair. I’m choosing to look at the racism of the world, the injustices of the world and all of the other evils that have dominated the news cycle of 2017 and choose to believe that God’s Kingdom has come.

This year, I’m choosing peace. Like a little girl, I’m going to believe when my father says, “I’ve got this.” I’m going to throw my hands in the air and jump into his arms and trust that he will catch me. This year, I’m going to believe him when he says, I can hear all of my children crying and I can wipe all of their tears away. I’m going to bury my tear stained face into his neck and trust him when he says, “I know baby, I’ve got this too.” I’m going to allow that trust to give me soul peace.

This year is going to be different. Because while I will still mourn the injustice that surrounds us, I’m going to choose to believe God that he knows who I am and how the story ends. I’m going to have a year filled with joy and peace regardless of the chaos that surrounds us.